Couples Therapy

You might be wondering, “Is this something couples counseling can help with? Is it too soon in the relationship to go to counseling? Are we too far gone for it to help?”

 

There's a whole host of reasons to seek couples counseling. Perhaps you are a newer couple looking to grow together, explore your compatibility and potential, or get ahead of bubbling issues before they become too difficult to overcome. Maybe you’ve been together for many years and are ready to acknowledge that you need outside support to work on your relationship because your typical way of handling challenges and conflict doesn’t seem to be working anymore. Or maybe your relationship has just been hit with a massive curveball (broken trust, fertility issues, illness, challenges with your children, loss of a loved one or a job, infidelity) and you aren’t sure you can overcome it. 

 

As a couples therapist, I can see the relationship with a fresh eye, not impeded by bias, and offer a unique perspective. We will identify the underlying emotions that drive your behaviors and lead to maladaptive patterns in your relationship. I will then work with you to re-write those patterns into ones that are restorative for your relationship and driven by your values as a couple. I will also provide you with new tools to help you express your needs to one another, relate with each other, and work together as a team.  

 

Couples therapy is most successful when:

 

• You are both open and willing to try counseling. If one of you doesn’t want to be there or feels forced to attend, it's very difficult to make any progress.

• Each of you are honest and able to take accountability for your part in the relationship. As a rule, in order to protect the therapeutic relationship, I do not help you keep secrets from your partner.

• You both want to work on the relationship. In some cases, one partner is invested, but the other has resigned to the relationship being over. Sometimes couples therapy can be a safe space to help both partners decide together if it’s time to move on or keep working on the relationship, but if one of you has already decided you are out, then individual therapy would be best in this situation.

• There is safety in the relationship. If there is physical violence or other forms of abuse (emotional, financial, etc.) in the relationship or if one or both of you are struggling with severe mental health challenges, individual therapy (perhaps at a higher level of care) is recommended first before couples therapy begins.

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If you and your partner are both ready to put in the work to understand yourselves better, and therefore, each other better, reach out today, and I would be happy to explore how we can work together to support your love for one another.